My very first impression within the first few seconds was that I liked the sparse, dry, lone guitar. It provided a beautiful starting foundation onto which to build the instrumentation, and I was preparing my ears for that. But when the double-tracked, hard-panned, room-reverberated vocals came in, and the instrumentation didn't change, my ears fatigued very quickly.
If I were producing this song, I would make several suggestions, but they are solely based on my personal preferences and may not be in line with the sound you are going for:
If you start with a single mono guitar, then keep the intimacy congruent by starting with a single mono vocal. Start embellishing and widening the instrumentation earlier in the song (the Rhodes and guitar sound great) and follow suit with the vocals in a way that isn't too juxtaposed.
Regarding the vocals and lyrics, I'm all about intelligibility. If I can't hear and understand every word, I'm not happy. "Oh the sunset's free now, he is free n'day," ???
"I know You are a great and merciful God," is far too hackneyed of a line to garner such repetition. It's what I call a generic, filler lyric. Can you change that line to make it more personally relevant? For example, "In the hour of temptation I have let You down; now I call on You to help me turn around" is an excellent line. Can you build on that?
So my critical opinion is this: If I were producing this song, I'll have to admit I would salvage that one line I like and write all new lyrics, write a bridge, and my approach to the engineering and mixing would be quite different, but the structure of the song would remain close to your vision.
My positive opinion is this: Overall, I like the arrangement. I hear a lot of potential in it. The melody is fantastic and the chord progressions work beautifully. I took a gander at your SoundCloud page. You've got some musical arranging chops. You would be a valuable asset to any songwriting collaboration team.