Erosion, Original Composition

Wes

New Member
Hello fellow music humans, this is an old composition I did a while ago, found it and added some mountain videos and I think it looks kinda cool. Feedback is always welcome!

 

tehreal

Active Member
Excellent effort. Nice Bach influences. Thanks for posting.

My main criticism is with the composition exhibiting the following "pattern":

idea -> new idea -> new idea -> new idea, etc.

The first time I feel like you were getting into the main idea of the piece as at :44. But then :56 came along and I was confused. Is this the main idea of the piece? At this point I thought, "It's got to be. It's lasting longer than the other ideas." But then 15 seconds later it all changes again. Then 9 seconds later it all changes again.

When you compose like this, the piece will sound like a bunch of intros patched together. There's not much to latch on to and enjoy the development of, i.e., it never "goes anywhere".

Try scaling everything back (maybe just piano?) and make a simple piece that does:

idea -> development of the idea -> further development of the idea -> new (but still related) idea -> original idea -> completely new development of the original idea -> end

Or something like that. Basically you want to take the listeners on a journey they can relate to.

Keep writing and having fun! Looking forward to the next!

P.S. I often struggle with the same thing btw so I know it ain't easy :)
 
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Wes

New Member
Excellent effort. Nice Bach influences. Thanks for posting.

My main criticism is with the composition exhibiting the following "pattern":

idea -> new idea -> new idea -> new idea, etc.

The first time I feel like you were getting into the main idea of the piece as at :44. But then :56 came along and I was confused. Is this the main idea of the piece? At this point I thought, "It's got to be. It's lasting longer than the other ideas." But then 15 seconds later it all changes again. Then 9 seconds later it all changes again.

When you compose like this, the piece will sound like a bunch of intros patched together. There's not much to latch on to and enjoy the development of, i.e., it never "goes anywhere".

Try scaling everything back (maybe just piano?) and make a simple piece that does:

idea -> development of the idea -> further development of the idea -> new (but still related) idea -> original idea -> completely new development of the original idea -> end

Or something like that. Basically you want to take the listeners on a journey they can relate to.

Keep writing and having fun! Looking forward to the next!

P.S. I often struggle with the same thing btw so I know it ain't easy :)
Thanks for the feedback, yeah I know what you mean with the different ideas. I'll keep that in mind moving forward! :)