# How to overcome Impostor Syndrome



## Waywyn (Dec 13, 2018)

Hey guys,

hope you enjoy the read. What do you think?

https://lifebuff.blog/how-to-overcome-the-impostor-syndrome/


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## gregh (Dec 13, 2018)

nice article, I think it is good you are sharing this - let me share this gold medal victory that shows that staying up all the way to the finish is one of the core skills. People sometimes forget that.


(I used to tell research students that most of the reason you get a PhD is because you could finish - making a piece of music and putting it out there for the public is in and of itself a worthwhile achievement. And compared to so many things people to do, a valuable achievement)


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## dflood (Dec 14, 2018)

It’s a good article. Imposter syndrome can be an impediment to moving forward, taking chances, getting over stage fright, or ever completing anything. And as the article points out, even when you have some success, it may keep you from feeling that it is truly deserved. 

Neil Gaiman (famous author) wrote a wonderful anecdote about it in his blog: 

Once you have some career successes, and people start looking to you as ‘the expert’ or ‘the master’, I think it’s still healthy to retain some degree of imposter syndrome. The trick is not to let it become debilitating. Conversely, the rare individuals who seem completely immune to it tend to fall into two categories: 

1. They lack any appreciable talent but are convinced that they are a genius.
2. They truly are genius, but you wouldn’t want to spend five minutes with them.


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## Mikro93 (Dec 14, 2018)

gregh said:


> I used to tell research students that most of the reason you get a PhD is because you could finish


Aaaaaaand I'm on VI-C instead of finishing my PhD. Perfect


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## gregh (Dec 14, 2018)

Mikro93 said:


> Aaaaaaand I'm on VI-C instead of finishing my PhD. Perfect


well another helpful anecdote for you - a friend of mine had a new research position at a prestigious US institution. He was no slouch - had major discoveries in human physiology (glucose transport) and was feeling pretty good about himself at this stage of his career. One night he went back in to work after dinner and thought - man o man I am so dedicated, so on top of this shit, no wonder I am so successful, they won't know what hits them when I start pumping out results.
He goes in to the lobby and waits for the elevator to come down. The door opens and it's some old guy heading off home after a long day at work. My friend recognises this old guy - he has his photo in the lobby with a Nobel prize to his name.
My friend thinks - I think I'm coming back in, working hard, pushing the envelope, building up a great research career and this guy with a Nobel hasn't even gone home for dinner yet. How much harder do I have to work.....
I used to think about his story a lot when I was working. I worked with some pretty smart people, big international reps, covers of Nature types, and they worked all the time. On the other hand I also worked with someone (Cambridge named chair) and they had a really balanced life. Whilst working all the time

In academia you come up against the smartest people you will ever meet and they all work really hard. Interestingly they all have their own ways of working hard - the best people do all sorts of interesting and stimulating things in their lives. To get successful you have to find your own way of enjoying working hard - finding that way, and living it, can sometimes require a lot of courage

As far as imposter syndrome goes, my experience and my experience working with others, has me thinking if you focus on the problem at hand, and are humble in the face of it, so that freely giving opinions and freely asking for and receiving help is uppermost, then there is no feeling of being an imposter, just a sense of moving forward to a shared and greater understanding.


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## Waywyn (Dec 18, 2018)

Thanks everyone for your awesome input!

I think the most important point to remember is how you continue to deal with it when it kicks in!
From my own experience it is always kicking in, just as someone scares you.
You have this "Duuuude, seriously???" moment ... but then it matters how you continue to deal with it!

If you work on your self confidence and you instantly remember WHY this feeling is kicking in, you can solve many situations. Most of the time it is enough to at least 75% to simply KNOW what is going on in your body and mind. If you are hungry, you know you have to eat ... so it is time to know what you have to do, once that impostor syndrome is kicking in!


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## LamaRose (Dec 18, 2018)

"Imposter Syndrome" sounds like a medical code used to charge out patient treatments... a much better term is "humility."


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## Waywyn (Dec 18, 2018)

LamaRose said:


> "Imposter Syndrome" sounds like a medical code used to charge out patient treatments... a much better term is "humility."



Just my personal opinion, but there is a huuuuuuuuuuuge difference, from simply having respect and humility especially for the skills of others and being aware of what we are not good at ... to ... being afraid that one day someone could knock at our door and expose us as frauds!


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## NYC Composer (Dec 18, 2018)

A word that is not used enough in many self help tomes is the word "confidence". A confident person believes he/she can do or learn how to do what's required in a given situation. You can throw "arrogance" and "humility" out the window-"confidence" will cover a lot of ground.

This doesn't mean that confident people won't sweat or won't have to work hard. It means they have a basis for believing in themselves.

I believe most confidence comes from good, supportive parenting. Once one's view of one's self (which is usually created by early parenting) is established, it's likely to remain stable throughout a lifetime. I'm not talking about the unfettered, unbridled imbuing of unearned self worth when I talk about good parenting. I'm talking about loving, supportive, stable and calm guidance with clear lines. There is no perfection, and parenting can be thankless at times, yet it's so so necessary.

I've known a lot of good parents and a lot of bad parents. The bad ones do terrible damage and the good ones give their kids an even chance at a happy, fulfilling life.

Confidence, and the gift of confidence, is key.


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## whiskers (Dec 18, 2018)

LamaRose said:


> "Imposter Syndrome" sounds like a medical code used to charge out patient treatments... a much better term is "humility."


I wouldn't really call it humility, so much as more of an inverse to the Dunning-Krueger effect, at least, in a fashion.

You can still be humble about accomplishments, but have confidence in your abilities and work output. Imposter syndrome implies doubts in ones ability (that should not often be there) and ones outputs as not worthy compared to peers.


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## Illico (Dec 19, 2018)

Waywyn said:


> hope you enjoy the read. What do you think?
> 
> https://lifebuff.blog/how-to-overcome-the-impostor-syndrome/



Thanks, very nice reading!

I actually working on a piece for a competition. I'm not a professionnal but I would like to make piece similar to them...I know its a dream but I try, because I enjoy it, I create something...

I'm going to quote you :


> Furthermore, you also experience less or no self doubt in what you do, because you simply enjoy it and be perfectly aware that this life is not about competition or finding anything, but about creating it


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## Vik (Dec 19, 2018)

NYC Composer said:


> A confident person believes he/she can do or learn how to do what's required in a given situation. You can throw "arrogance" and "humility" out the window-"confidence" will cover a lot of ground.


Confidence/trust is important, but there are several types of confidence. And one lack of confidence isn't related to oneself, but to others; one can be confident about being able to create music which both you and others will like, but not necessarily confident that there are enough people out there who would pay for but such music. The end result could be a create person with lots of ideas and the ability to realise them, but who feels that the tedious part (talking about orchestral music here) may not be worth spending time on. So that's not really lack of self confidence, but lack of confidence that 'the world' (which generally seems to me most interested in catchy, simple pop-is songs or action move music) would pay much attention if one invested lots of time and money in converting all these ideas into recorded pieces.


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## NYC Composer (Dec 20, 2018)

People (clients, for example) are more likely to believe in your abilities if you believe in yourself.

My post was more macro than micro-I was speaking broadly about life, not just a career in music.


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## Waywyn (Dec 20, 2018)

NYC Composer said:


> A word that is not used enough in many self help tomes is the word "confidence". A confident person believes he/she can do or learn how to do what's required in a given situation. You can throw "arrogance" and "humility" out the window-"confidence" will cover a lot of ground.
> 
> This doesn't mean that confident people won't sweat or won't have to work hard. It means they have a basis for believing in themselves.
> 
> ...



Nicely put. As I wrote in my post. Lots of doubts come from the negative set of beliefs we build up as kids, being heavily influenced by our main educators. Most of the time there is a way to "heal" and get out of it. It doesn't necessarily mean that our whole childhood had to be a bad one, but there can be many moments which really can influence our life as being grown ups!


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