# Musical Flatulence



## Studio E (Feb 8, 2019)

...or playing "fartissimo" if you will. Just saying. I started a new 40 minute film. It's not the worst thing I've ever seen but it's also far from inspiring. The musical references from the director were few and of what was offered, also not too exciting. I finally got a foot-hold of a motif of sorts but wow do I just feel like I'm "farting around". I mean it all really feels pretty hollow and meaningless. Not that I am saying "Woe is me" or anything. It's just amazing at how serious we take all of our ambitions, our craft, and beat ourselves up about knowing what we're doing, having all the best sounds, building giant templates, and then writing arpeggiated, pulsing, rhythmically-sync'd musical equivalents to the effects of having eaten too much Taco Bell. 

I still have hope that there becomes a rhyme or a reason as to why the music does what it does in this film, and I always want things to have meaning, but the truest meaning behind this particular project may just be that I was feeling musically bloated and needed to relieve myself into a Cubase project file. In the end I'm sure that if nothing else, it will sound like a decent production with a well handled mix, but I always think of every project as being a chance to do my best work ever. This one, mmmmm.....not so much.


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## d.healey (Feb 8, 2019)




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## sostenuto (Feb 8, 2019)

Surely just a _*passing*_ thing ….. Not using _*Afflatus*_ by any chance ?


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## studiostuff (Feb 8, 2019)

Why not just turn down (refuse to do) the project...? There are many young composers who would dig deep to come up with something useful for the project. 

Have you told the director/production company how you feel? I bet not. It seems a little cowardly to continue. 

You sound like you're not the guy for this one...


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## Studio E (Feb 8, 2019)

d.healey said:


>



And to think I was in D minor. A much...ahem, darker key.


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## Studio E (Feb 8, 2019)

studiostuff said:


> Why not just turn down (refuse to do) the project...? There are many young composers who would dig deep to come up with something useful for the project.
> 
> Have you told the director/production company how you feel? I bet not. It seems a little cowardly to continue.
> 
> You sound like you're not the guy for this one...


I’ll try my darnedest to create something “useful”. A gig is still a gig.


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## sostenuto (Feb 8, 2019)

Studio E said:


> I’ll try my darnedest to create something “useful”. A gig is still a gig.



Not a doubt you will sort this into something as cool as it can be. 

_Sounds like this is a project for AIR Studios tho _……… :emoji_balloon:


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## Living Fossil (Feb 8, 2019)

Studio E said:


> In the end I'm sure that if nothing else, it will sound like a decent production with a well handled mix, but I always think of every project as being a chance to do my best work ever. This one, mmmmm.....not so much.



Try to embrace the experience... 
Maybe it will be helpful for future projects for some reasons you don't know yet.


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## studiostuff (Feb 8, 2019)

A gig is a gig? 

Forgive me, you sound like a sex-worker. Not that I would have any experience with what a sex-worker sounds like...  

What about integrity...? Serious question to you. Why would you slag the production here?

Why not just dummy up, do the gig, and then, write some music that brings peace to earth? 

Where I live, this sort of fun causes your phone to never work again...!


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## Studio E (Feb 8, 2019)

studiostuff said:


> A gig is a gig?
> 
> Forgive me, you sound like a sex-worker. Not that I would have any experience with what a sex-worker sounds like...
> 
> ...



Oh boy, I seem to be either asking for these types of responses and not realizing it, or just getting really lucky lately, lol. 

So was it the moaning that tipped you off regarding your first question? Haha, just giving you a hard time. Integrity? As if I don't have it? Dude, you don't know me, and you also don't know the project I'm working on, at all. Why is that? Well, because I didn't mention it by title, director, production company, or in any other way. I know you don't know me at all, so maybe don't make any assumptions. My track record speaks for itself. 

https://www.imdb.com/name/nm5716754/?ref_=fn_al_nm_1

https://ericwatkinsmusic.com/videos

I'm not bragging. I'm just saying; I've worked and worked a decent amount. My IMDB page shows about 10% of the work that I've been paid to produce. I've NEVER left a director, producer, or ad agency with anything less than something that exceeded their own expectations, or so I've been told, time after time.

Dummy up? Seriously, I'm not even sure what that means, but it sure sounds shitty. I've been "dummying up" at about 4:00am to work on this particular gig before I go out and play "Building Inspector" from 8:00 till 5:00 everyday and then come home to a remodeling project that's been going on for months now. I'm the guy that gets paid to make sure you are safe in your home and every other building you visit in your entire life, writes music for commercials, films, records bands, runs a jack hammer all day in my basement to run new plumbing underground for a new bathroom for clients in the studio, hangs drywall, installs furnaces and air-conditioners, etc etc etc. Is that what "dummy up" entails? If so, I think I have it covered.

Btw, my phone rings off the freaking hook. I sometimes wish it would stop. 

Sorry, but "Desire Inspires" called me out a while back about a post I made as well. I LOVE VI-control and was just recently thinking in my off time (which doesn't actually exist) about how I needed to write a post just about that, but I still can't believe how many people seem to jump to a particular conclusion about others and splay their opinion immediately based on a single post. I still think this place is amazing, but some of the negativity, which is just a part of life, just amazes me. 

Concerning your statement about passing this along to a younger composer, I have indeed opened up opportunities for other composers a few times on this site. Not for paying work but for real projects where all involved were dedicating their time and talents for the sake of art, as I have many many times. In the end (for me) those relationships built in the process of those free projects , resulted in thousands of dollars worth of paid work for those same directors. My point being, I DO lookout for younger or less experienced talent, I have spoken for free, given demonstrations at the local art council and film makers, hosted workshops in my home for film scoring and mixing, etc etc.... 

But thank you for your concern and I hope I can change my posts in the future to please you better and give you warm, fuzzy feels about what I am doing and what my motivations are. Btw, I might have just been being a little hard on myself and cathartic at the same time, seeing as this is a forum of composers and not a place for my filmmaker to hangout.


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## Jimmy Hellfire (Feb 8, 2019)

Studio E said:


> It's just amazing at how serious we take all of our ambitions, our craft, and beat ourselves up about knowing what we're doing, having all the best sounds, building giant templates, and then writing arpeggiated, pulsing, rhythmically-sync'd musical equivalents to the effects of having eaten too much Taco Bell.



That's something I keep reminding myself all the time.


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## Chr!s (Feb 8, 2019)

Studio E said:


> Oh boy, I seem to be either asking for these types of responses and not realizing it, or just getting really lucky lately, lol.
> 
> So was it the moaning that tipped you off regarding your first question? Haha, just giving you a hard time. Integrity? As if I don't have it? Dude, you don't know me, and you also don't know the project I'm working on, at all. Why is that? Well, because I didn't mention it by title, director, production company, or in any other way. I know you don't know me at all, so maybe don't make any assumptions. My track record speaks for itself.
> 
> ...



This whole rant is unnecessary and reads as one of those "I only sleep 2 hours, wake up at 4 so I can work on 2 different music gigs, and do sound design, and do voice acting, _and then_ go to my full-time, important day job. #getonmylevelbitches" posts you see on Twitter.

This whole e-dick comparison contest of "who sacrifices more on the altar of music" that goes on with composer forums is really weird, honestly.

His point to me seems pretty simple:



Studio E said:


> but I always think of every project as being a chance to do my best work ever. This one, mmmmm.....not so much.





Studio E said:


> I'm not bragging. I'm just saying; I've worked and worked a decent amount. My IMDB page shows about 10% of the work that I've been paid to produce.



_Then why bother doing it if that's the case_? Like, it's a valid question.

If you have all this paid work, and you always strive to provide the best, and you're all about professionalism...

Taking on a job you find uninspiring and then griping about how uninspiring about it is on a forum is completely counter-intuitive to those three points.



Studio E said:


> Not that I am saying "Woe is me" or anything.



You are though, this entire post is one that can only be born out of lament.

Like, I'm not trying to start any shit, but I just don't see what point you're trying to make here.

Life is too short to spend it working on uninspiring music projects.


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## CT (Feb 8, 2019)

studiostuff said:


> There are many young composers who would dig deep to come up with something useful for the project.



Yep... don't care what it is. If Jerry Goldsmith could stomach "Mom and Dad Save The World" when he was in his 60's, I can summon up some motivation if it means an actual paying gig in my long stretch as a penniless nobody.


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## Studio E (Feb 9, 2019)

Man, I think some of you read too seriously into my original post. My point was more of the fact that sometimes, our own music is just not that impressive to ourselves (and probably others). I think Ed Harris wraps it up fairly well here, although it's not his own music in the scene he is berating.



And yes, when someone tells me I should "dummy up", as if I'm just not doing enough, it pisses me off and I am likely to list a few reasons why I don't think of myself as lazy. I am FAR from an amazing, original composer, but I do work my ass off, plain and simple.

This is a forum of composers for the most part. I was expressing the fact that sometimes our music just sucks, and the particular project isn't helping. Hopefully it rang true to a few others here. I'm an artist. Sometimes I express myself, on forums....like an idiot, lol. 

Ok, back to said project......


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## Studio E (Feb 9, 2019)

Living Fossil said:


> Try to embrace the experience...
> Maybe it will be helpful for future projects for some reasons you don't know yet.


Absolutely.


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## Akarin (Feb 9, 2019)

I hear you! Spent months crafting my ultimate template. 4k tracks and counting. Nicely balanced, pre-EQed, panned, routed. Awesome orchestral libraries...

...and currently, I'm asked for some cues. "Oh, just do some drone ambiances with a couple Omnisphere patches and a few hits." :-p


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## Studio E (Feb 9, 2019)

Akarin said:


> I hear you! Spent months crafting my ultimate template. 4k tracks and counting. Nicely balanced, pre-EQed, panned, routed. Awesome orchestral libraries...
> 
> ...and currently, I'm asked for some cues. "Oh, just do some drone ambiances with a couple Omnisphere patches and a few hits." :-p



Thank you! Nail-on-head!


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## Akarin (Feb 9, 2019)

Studio E said:


> Thank you! Nail-on-head!



On the other hand, that's the job. I like the challenge of "how do I make this better?" given what I'm asked to work with.


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## Studio E (Feb 9, 2019)

Akarin said:


> On the other hand, that's the job. I like the challenge of "how do I make this better?" given what I'm asked to work with.


And I totally agree.


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## AlexRuger (Feb 9, 2019)

I was playing in a band that overall had a great catalog, but there was this one song that everyone in the band, except the band-leader, hated. Naturally, we had to play it every night. I remember talking to the bassist about this, and he said, "Just because I don't like a song doesn't mean I'm not gonna rock the fuck out." Good advice.

I wrote one of my usual(?) novellas obliterating what I just said, but I figure this is the wrong crowd for that 

Anyways, I feel you dude. If it's crap to begin with, at least don't let yourself get sucked into a fucked up schedule vortex. No sense in sitting on the toilet longer than you have to.


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## Studio E (Feb 10, 2019)

Well I'm happy to report that the flatulence that would be my musical contribution is starting to take shape. I think I frequently grasp onto the simplest of melodic ideas, but then really really love developing the supporting tracks. I'd call it orchestration but I'm not at all trained in that so I'll avoid that term. 

What gives me hope in my contribution, is when I turn off the dialogue/foley track and just listen to what I am producing musically, and I like what I hear. It is indeed written to picture, but I almost like it better on it's own. Anyway, just thought I'd update the thread since it feels much much better at this point. No worries, my music still feels as worthy as a fart to me but then again, I do indeed give myself a pretty hard time during the writing sessions. This thing is wall-to-wall music for 38 minutes, almost a record length for me.


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## Desire Inspires (Feb 10, 2019)

studiostuff said:


> A gig is a gig?
> 
> Forgive me, you sound like a sex-worker. Not that I would have any experience with what a sex-worker sounds like...



I said something similar in another thread about this poster and everyone gave me a hard time. I told the truth and people got angry at me. 

This poster is either terribly naive or is trolling. Either way, I can’t even take it seriously.


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## Studio E (Feb 10, 2019)

Desire Inspires said:


> I said something similar in another thread about this poster and everyone gave me a hard time. I told the truth and people got angry at me.
> 
> This poster is either terribly naive or is trolling. Either way, I can’t even take it seriously.



You told the truth based on your obviously narrow perspective. I am humble first and foremost. That's generally where my posts come from. I am far from trolling but you might want to look at your own track record. My point, were you to understand it, would be that I sometimes feel that my own contribution is a bit meaningless. That said, I can guarantee I will work my ass off to make it the best I can in the end. 

In the meanwhile, please post your major accomplishments so I can judge you the same way you have been so quick to judge me. If I am to judge you solely off of your posts, I'd say your definition of a troll could be found in the nearest mirror.


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