# Considering leaving my role



## Megaman (Sep 15, 2018)

For quite awhile I've considered leaving my position as an assistant, however it's been difficult with timing as there always seems to be something in the works that spans well over 6-8 months. For this role obviously putting in two weeks would be screwing over the composer, but what is a fair amount of time to give? The reason I've been thinking of leaving is that moral has been horribly low, about 40% of the directions given to me end up as a waste of time from poor word choice/ miscommunication, and there's always a slight attitude with everything. Hoping someone else has been in my position!


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## Desire Inspires (Sep 15, 2018)

Quit immediately.


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## NoamL (Sep 15, 2018)

Are you remote or in the studio? It's worth having a talk with your boss about communication issues, what is/isn't working.

"Slight" attitude with everything? Consider that a blessing  First guy who ever mentored me when I moved to LA told me right to my face, "I onboarded you so you could make my life easier not so you could have fun." And I needed to hear that at the time.


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## Gerhard Westphalen (Sep 15, 2018)

If you haven't been treated properly then you could quit whenever you want. Otherwise I'd say it depends on how long it would take to train someone new. If you're just an assistant doing the odd thing then 2 weeks notice might be OK. If you're the main tech there and the only person who knows how things work, then it could take 6 months to find someone new, train, and transition. In that case, it may be good to set a firm deadline rather than just "in a few months" or else new things will always come up and you'll be roped into it.

I recently did an internship at a studio where their assistant was leaving and they were basically splitting her job into 2 part time jobs (one musical assistant and one person taking care of all the business side). They spent quite a few months transitioning.


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## Bill the Lesser (Sep 15, 2018)

Don't forget to protect your reputation! Door slams don't look good on your résumé. Even if your boss is widely considered a jerk, your next interviewer is going to see events more from his point of view more than yours. Good bosses usually hold out for stable employees.


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## Kony (Sep 15, 2018)

The standard notice period is 4 weeks. There is no need to leave on bad terms btw, you can just give four weeks notice and then leave. If you need to give a reason, you can simply say it's time to move on or you want to take a sabbatical to focus on composing or something like that.


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## Patrick de Caumette (Sep 15, 2018)

Don't quit without giving notice: bad for your reputation and the least you can do considering you have been making a living thanks to that dude.


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## JohnG (Sep 15, 2018)

Kony said:


> The standard notice period is 4 weeks.



Not in the USA it isn't. Two weeks is standard.

Sometimes, if things started ok but then deteriorated, it's possible to say, "hey, things worked better when I started. I was more efficient and got more done for you. I feel that we could get back to that -- I would like to get back to that."

Then if you can describe what you think made it work before, you maybe can restart and have some more fun.

But if you really want to quit in any event, tell him "it's not working for me." and get out as fast as you can.


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## Kony (Sep 15, 2018)

Thanks for the info JohnG, I wasn't aware of the USA difference. Four weeks notice is still good though. I often find that trying to "re-set" the relationship rarely works. It might get better for a while, but will eventually go back to where the OP is now. I'm generalising of course, but this is based purely on my own experience.


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## AlexRuger (Sep 15, 2018)

Give as much notice as you can (seriously -- more is always better, and two weeks is hardly ever enough for composers if you want to stay on their good side), but also give a firm date and _stick to it. _If they rope you into more time, negotiate a new rate or walk as planned. As always: stick to your guns, while being the kindest person in the room (easier said than done). Assuming you do all this, I'm sure you'll exit gracefully.

However.

What's next? Unfortunately, this sounds to me like an absolutely typical assistant job. The sad reality is that the vast majority of composers make shit managers. Everyone is always stressed and tired, and (the elephant in the room) have totally competing interests -- the assistants are ultimately there to help themselves, and the composer is training their competition! 

So what I'm saying is...are you expecting something different from your next assistant job? If you are, don't. Are you going freelance expecting it will be better than being an assistant? If you are, _really _don't.


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## JJP (Sep 15, 2018)

It's hard say what your relationship with the composer is. If you care about this person and want to do right by her or him you could say, "I will complete all the projects to which I am currently assigned, but will be leaving after that. I can't take on any new projects because I don't want to abandon you in the middle of a project."

Obviously, you'll have to determine how long the current projects will last and if you are comfortable staying that long, but this approach can give you a graceful exit while also demonstrating professional responsibility and loyalty. That may be helpful if you are looking for a recommendation from this composer later.


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## JJP (Sep 15, 2018)

NoamL said:


> First guy who ever mentored me when I moved to LA told me right to my face, "I onboarded you so you could make my life easier not so you could have fun."


That's not a mentor. That's an employer.


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## Jimmy Hellfire (Sep 15, 2018)

AlexRuger said:


> Everyone is always stressed and tired, and (the elephant in the room) have totally competing interests -- the assistants are ultimately there to help themselves, and the composer is training their competition!



Living the dream!


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## AllanH (Sep 16, 2018)

@Megaman - your employer is paying you to get your services in return. You are after all supposed to be of "assistance" as an assistant. I know this sounds harsh, but that is the fundamental premise of hiring someone: The employer expects to get substantial value in return for his/her money.

With that, I think there are several ways to look at this: The composer does not always know everything. Maybe the first many of his/your ideas were not good and it is reasonable to ask you to redo your work. Requirements for the composer may have changed, and the composer may ask you to redo. 

If you internalize the change process as a conflict between you and the composer, you need to look at your attitude (imo - sorry). No creative process gets it correct on first try. Even John Williams openly talks about redoing his work repeatedly until it meet the director's (and his own) standards.

If you're paid hourly/daily, you should simply do as asked and be as constructive as you can. Instead of focusing on the change request, offer your input. If you're paid "per project", then there is a conversation to be had.

I would suggest you proceed with the composer as follows: Ask for guidance. Tell the composer that you don't always feel that you're as effective as you'd like to be. Ask what he/she would like different. Be positive and engaging. You might even learn something 

If you chose to separate make sure to do it with a "thank you" and offer to assist with the transition.


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## Manaberry (Sep 16, 2018)

Notice period of 4 weeks, 2 weeks... My last two jobs it was 12 weeks! 

Like others already said, be pro even if you are really.. really tired of the job. You might cross the path of those people later in your life. You need them to have a good last impression of you.

Good luck!


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## wst3 (Sep 16, 2018)

some excellent advice! My two cents...

If you think that you and he can salvage the relationship give that a try first. If it works then you are in good shape, if it doesn't, you've set the stage for a professional and courteous exit.

If it does not work out be honest and polite, ask how much notice he would like and negotiate a mutually agreeable period. Sometimes that turns out to be a sliding window - 4 weeks full time, then part time until you discharge whatever obligations on which you agree.

Sadly this may not be the last time you separate from an employer. It seems to me that it is getting more common, not less, and that's across the board.

Treat him the way you'd like to be treated and the outcome can be positive.

Good luck!


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## LamaRose (Sep 16, 2018)

@AllanH is sharing some solid advice. I would add that you should spend some time each week scouting out new opportunities... it may take awhile for that next stepping stone to present itself.


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## DocMidi657 (Sep 17, 2018)

First try to work it out by asking for a meeting. If you can get a meeting "stay very calm when you speak" with your boss. Think about your boss's needs well before the meeting and what your issues are. Offer well thought out solutions to the issues you have and be willing to compromise on some things whenever you can. Always remember when you are earning money there will AWAYS be "issues and challenges" (it's just the way it goes). Something that has always helped me is to remember that successful people don't expect issues to not be present but they "manage and work thru those issues" and keep their emotional balance as best as they can when doing this. That's the secret imho and is tough but do it anyway as it's in your best interest. If you can't work it out then ask yourself this question.... Do you have another job "securely" lined up? When it comes to making a living and being in a very difficult situtuation never "run from something" but "run to something". As challenging as that is (looking for a job while you have one) and since YOU are asking for advice that would be better for YOU. It's waaaay better to interview for another job while you are still currently employed for a number of reasons including your peace of mind.  If you aready have another job then "take the high road" and work out a transition that serves your current employer really well but also does not jeopardize your new position (by taking too long to start). Communicate well and respectfully with both your current employer and your future employer during the transition period so expectations are understood by all and demonstrated that they are clearly met. E-mails are great for this btw. In the past when I left a position for another I asked my future employer "how soon do you need me?.. and then quickly stated "I certainly don't want to leave my current employer in a lurch and they may need more than the two weeks that is customary". Then be very quiet and listen to what they say. Then you will know what you have to work with when going back to your current employer.


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## Desire Inspires (Sep 17, 2018)

Manaberry said:


> Notice period of 4 weeks, 2 weeks... My last two jobs it was 12 weeks!
> 
> Like others already said, be pro even if you are really.. really tired of the job. You might cross the path of those people later in your life. You need them to have a good last impression of you.
> 
> Good luck!



Not really.

So much bad advice given when it comes to leaving a job.

Some jobs do not deserve any notice, and you would be better to disappear and never look back. Some bridges are meant to be burned. Build newer and better bridges.

If you seriously think about life, most people will not even remember you enough to care if you quit without notice. You should be building yourself up to succeed, not to stay subservient to people for years and years and years.

Remember, people also need to leave a good impression on you. You could rise to power and be in a position to employ those same people you worked for earlier in life.

Never sell yourself short.


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## Manaberry (Sep 18, 2018)

Desire Inspires said:


> Not really.
> 
> So much bad advice given when it comes to leaving a job.
> 
> ...



You got a point on something, there is differences between EU and US in terms of leaving a job.
I think OP is enough smart to choose the best way to leave his job with all the replies on this thread, so I don't see bad advice. Only experience sharing.

Even if there is no notice period (or employer doesn't deserve any kindness), it cost nothing to do it the right way. Ego should not be part of the equation.


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## Jeremy Spencer (Sep 18, 2018)

I you don't need this employer as a reference, then just quit (if you can afford it), your health is much important than a shitty job that makes you sick to your stomach every time you set foot in the door. Otherwise, 2 weeks is more than ample. In Canada, two weeks notice is the standard. Any more than that, and the employer will surely take full advantage of you...squeezing every last ounce of energy from you.


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## garyhiebner (Sep 18, 2018)

This doesn't happen to be linked to Junkie XL looking for a new assistant does it?


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## AlexRuger (Sep 18, 2018)

garyhiebner said:


> This doesn't happen to be linked to Junkie XL looking for a new assistant does it?


Haha! No. That's me who's leaving that job, and I'm doing so for very different reasons than the OP -- Tom is a pal and a half.


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## merlinhimself (Sep 18, 2018)

I totally get what you're going through, it can be a tough job with hard hours and a lot of stress. If you think you would be in a better place seeing the assistantship through, such as starting to write/ getting your own projects/ having built a portfolio to go off on your own, give yourself some "quit dates". Whether it's a month or 3 months, you can make your decision to quit then. There's always rough days or weeks even, but don't let those times change what could potentially be a great future for yourself. Idk your situation exactly, but if you see it paying off in any way, it may be worth to see it out.


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## garyhiebner (Sep 18, 2018)

AlexRuger said:


> Haha! No. That's me who's leaving that job, and I'm doing so for very different reasons than the OP -- Tom is a pal and a half.



Haha, only joking. Good luck with your next adventure @AlexRuger


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